How Do You Respond to Compliments?
Have you ever noticed the way people respond when you give them a compliment?
As soon as you finish reading this post, go up to three people and give them a sincere compliment. Say something like, "You are really good at…" Listen closely and watch them respond in one of the following five ways:
Denial – "No, I’m not really that good."
Not Yet – "I’m not there yet… but I’ll get there… eventually."
Transfer of Credit – "It’s not me… it’s so-and-so who is the good one."
Return Compliment – "Me? You’re the one that’s really good at…"
Confidence – "Thank you… I appreciate that!"
Ok… time to go give it a try… come back and tell us what you learned.
So… How did they respond?
When someone gives you a compliment, how do you respond?
I usually say " i learned it from you"
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That's a perfect example of the "Return Compliment!" LOL
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it all depends on who are you complimenting and how! sometimes we compliment coz its a formality -- like compliment your boss for earning a brownie!! & then there is complimenting for geniuine work done!! as for me i would return the compliment by saying:-
"thank you --i would not have been able to achieve the needful without your support"
cheerz. Benaifer
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I was most interested to find that people seem shocked that they were given a compliment, it didn't seem to matter if it was about their appearance or the work they were doing.
For me, that is a sad commentary on how little our society complements each other.
As to how I accept complements, 3 years ago Bill Barker of PI Midlantic challenged me to answer with your confidence response. I have practiced that ever since. Even for the complements I don't "own" internally yet.
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If someone makes the effort to notice my work, whether personal or professional, I respond with confidence.
The reason? It is an acknowledgement of their generosity and grace, recognition that their opinion is valuable, and to be seen as appreciative, since many people pooh-pooh the effort today. We should not discourage people from recognizing and acknowledging the contribution of others!
I then respond with a compliment of my own… I might say something like, “Thank you for noticing! You are very kind.”
Regards, Lori Ruff, Leadership and Communications Coach
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For some reason when people receive a compliment they act as if they are not worthy,they appear to withdraw a little and are sometimes embarrassed. I generally take this opportunity to try to draw them out and allow them to enjoy the moment and to realize what they did had value. This normally allows me to make a new friend if I did not already know them and gain insight into their lives. This just naturally, for me, allows me to network with them and advance their cause and add to my network.
If I receive the compliment I tell them, "Thank you, I really appreciate you for noticing." Then I try to get to know them and they become a new friend and another part of my network. Networking as with SalesBlogcast.com or LinkedIn is crucial today. If you don't do it now, you should start as you will soon be behind the curve.
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It usually depends on the situation, but I always reply with thank you, and when relevant, return with a compliment. I like Bob's comment above, it shows he is a relationship person.
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I say "thank you, I really appreciate that." I don't go looking for compliments, or validation, but when I get it, I really DO appreciate that. So, I let the person who gave it know how important it was to me that they said it. Also, I was taught long ago that anything I'm looking to receive, I might think about giving that more. So, I compliment others a lot. Lastly, I just learned at the Millionaire Mind Intensive seminar how to say "thank you" when someone says they love me (instead of automatically saying "I love you too). That's an interesting one. Try it.
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Denial was the most common response as I gave strength centered comments to customers and friends.
This response may have the effect of telling the giver he or she does not know what they are talking about. In the Dale Carnegie Course we encourage people to accept compliments with a simple "Thank you". Both parties will enjoy it more! As the receiver affirms the giver.
My response to a compliment is a simple "Thank you!". And by the way, when someone says thank you, please don't say "no problem" a "you're welcome" means so much more, don't you agree??
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